No this isn't because I am unable to spell, the Peath bit is on account of the fact that I now have one tooth less in my head. In fact, apart from my wisdom teeth, this is the only other body part I have ever intentionally lost. The throbbing tooth, or rather gap, is similar to toothache, yet now I know how it feels to be in pain from bumping your gums.
Anyway, onward and upwards. My writing has taken a bit of a back seat as mentally my mind has been planning my funeral, fixed in the belief that the anaesthetic would do for me, but in fact the only anxious part of the whole procedure was the removal of my acrylic nails. It was so humiliating and when asked to remove the pair of furry gloves just before I went down for surgery, insult was added to injury further, when they informed me I need only have removed two of the nails; just so they can see if I'm turning blue and they need to get out the electrodes! If that is the case then why did they print, 'all body piercings and acrylic nails need to be removed or we will not carry out the surgery'. I bet this was written by a man who had engaged in an argument with his wife that morning, or a mistress who had just used his credit card for some immoral amount of frippery, or a matron with PMT. Anyway with no time to readdress the issue I decided to stay schtumm until after the surgery, my letter of formal complaint should now be with my local MP and the copy should be with Gordon Brown for a bit of bedtime reading material no doubt; he has probably sent his secretary on a quest to locate the make of the nails to cover up his nail biting excesses. Anyway, Hint of the Day you heard it here first... if you find yourself in this situation, just remove two nails.
I would have been considered somewhat sad to take a cuddly toy into day surgery, so I chose to take my good friend and classic 'Rebecca'. I know I have read this book beyond counting, but I truly adore the text. It is like visiting an old friend as text and film image merge together seamlessly. The pace and rise and fall of the language is, for me, exceptional. I had forgotten how beautiful it is. It was my comfort blanket to set my mind into a calm place, to forget about acrylic nails, starvation and funerals.
When I eventually lost the palour of grey frost, I managed to muster enough enthusiasm to watch a second rate film last night through the mist of the drugs. It helped me to realise where I have been going wrong in my writing. Another revelation, three revelations in one year must benchmark a good year. It was clear to me that I am not allowing my characters enough time to get to know each other, so the writing of their relationship and how they interact is 'thin' to say the least. One of my scripts I feel absolutely committed to is 'Repentance'. The story of a forbidden love in 1804 between black slave and unmarried white socialite. Nothing like the raunchy Mandingo for those who remember it, Repentance is essentially a love story in the true Love Story writing model. My next project therefore is to rewrite my 102 pages into a tighter format cutting out as many unnecessary adjectives as possible and writing about the real emotion. Wish me luck. In addition, I am almost ready to send off a Rom-Com to my new best friend the heavyweight producer with access to Hollywood, although I won't hold my breath or I will be planning my funeral again.
Christmas looms, the parties and invites are starting, so I tally forth as an optimist, firm in the belief that a new story lies somewhere out there for me to develop.
Foxi Rosie signing off xx
3 comments:
Cracking post, Rosie! Loved the bit about the nails. It's the anti-bacterial wash for three days before the operation that depresses me. (Did you get that?) Somehow, it feels personal.
It's amazing how much more you can learn from second rate fiction than from great art. The masterpieces of literature just make you want to lock yourself in the bathroom with a packet of razor blades but when, for one reason or another, you read or watch something that is okay but a bit crap really, you are often visited by an epiphany that makes you want to rush into your study, turn on the computer and get down to business.
Hate to be the one to tell you Brian, but it is personal.
Nope, I just had to vaseline up - as in mouth - for a whole week beforehand so my aging skin was more elastic and wouldn't rip like paper... Still at least the Patagonian wide mouth frog look is wearing off, the look is soooo last year.
Your comment about the packet of razor blades made me laugh out loud, fabulous kodak moment.
I hope all goes well and keep up with the anti-bacterial wash. On a positive note, at least everyone will know what to buy you for Christmas, present shopping just got a whole lot easier, I understand that Waitrose is offering discount for a case - or was that on wine by the case? Difficult to wrap up crutches though unless someone has imagination and makes them look like a tree or a Nimbus 2000 or a scud missile.
xx
Rosie, have you seen the newish "Rebecca"? It's Charles Dance and Emilia Fox, and while not a patch on the original, it's worth seeing, just for the two of them (personal favorites).
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